Let's suppose you're out for the afternoon; you're driving and listening to the radio, perhaps, or you are shopping in stores where Christmas music is playing in an endless loop as it has been since the "Back to School" sales signs came down in September (I kid, but not by much, alas).
Then it comes on. That song. That one that makes you grit your teeth in a way that delights your dentist but wreaks havoc on your ability to enjoy Christmas candy. The one that causes you to mutter and look enviously at senior citizen shoppers who have only to turn down their hearing aids to escape the horror. The one that makes you wish that Eris would arise and sow all the discord she can muster upon that minx Euterpe. That horrible, horrible Christmas song.
Okay. What is it?
For me, Paul McCartney's drivelish drooling display of dulcet dreadfulness titled Wonderful Christmastime is that song, though it narrowly edged out Band-Aid's jarring Do They Know It's Christmas, which at least has the excuse of being a fundraiser.
My girls' unanimous choice, though, was Taylor Swift's Last Christmas, which they dislike for the overall sappiness as well as the fact that the thing has been played incessantly and is fast becoming a Christmas earworm.
Thad dislikes most Christmas music, on the excellent grounds that he gets sick of it in early October and then has two more months of increasing Christmas-music air time before radios go back to playing back-to-back commercials with the occasional song thrown in. Two older songs he doesn't much like to hear are Little Drummer Boy and Do You Hear What I Hear? But the songs he really dislikes most are what he calls the sad Christmas songs, and he mentioned Karen Carpenter's Merry Christmas Darling as a prime example of this type.
Okay: your turn! What Christmas song drives you crazy by December 25 each year?
UPDATE: AAAAGH! How could I ever forget the All Time Worst Song Ever to be Played on the Radio at Christmastime???